Comfort amidst the dust

Psalm 103:13-14

As a father shows compassion to his children,
so the LORD shows compassion to those who fear him.
For he knows our frame;
he remembers that we are dust.

A while back I was lying in bed trying to sleep and I started thinking about the creation account of human kind (recently I "re" began my Bible read through in Genesis and it has been on my mind and heart). I was captivated by the picture of God reaching into the dirt and molding a sculpture from the earths clay... and then breathing His life into it. In fact, as I continued to think, it slowly turned into a poem (which I wrote about a while back).

When I was in High School I took art for a couple of years and clay was one of my favorite things to work with - so much so that I actually continued to do a bit of sculpting in college. It is a great medium (artistic NOT spirit "communicator") because it feels like you are a kid again messing around in the mud. By the end of a piece you usually have it all over your hands, arms and face. As the clay dries it slowly turns to dust and, inevitably, that dust finds itself all over every other part of your body, desk, room, house...

Clay is messy...
a lot like us.

This week I heard someone quote Psalm 103 and I was struck again with the beauty and power of the creation picture. But, as you read deeper, the Psalm says more than that... it seems to suggest that their can be peace and comfort found in the knowledge of who God is and who we are.

As a society, we seem so bent on becoming
powerful,
strong,
tough...
not very dust like...
yet dust we are.

It is amazing to me... God, the very Lord of lords, the Master sculptor of existence, reaches down into the dirt and forms a fragile clay man and then (in what is one of the most dramatic moments in history) pulls the clay close, like a Father with His child, and breaths the breath of LIFE into its earthen soul...

AND WHOOSH... life is!

And He looks upon His earthen man with an eternal eye and sees Himself nailed to a wooden tree (that He planted)... and has compassion... because He knows we are dust AND He loves us anyways.

The "Hand of God"

1 Peter 5:5-7

...Clothe yourselves, all of you, with humility toward one another, for "God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble."
Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you.

It is amazing how often I find myself surprised by what God does.

I know, I know... it seems like a subtle (or not so subtle) form of arrogance but so often I think to myself, "huh, I didn't see that coming". Why it should surprise me that I don't understand the plan that God has OR why He chooses to do what He does is beyond me... obviously. Recently a friend of mine (thank you Sophia) shared a picture she had drawn about how God moves in her life. It was actually two pictures that communicate a very powerful idea about God.

The first picture showed her with a mighty hand behind her gentle nudging her forward as she lived her life. I imagine this hand as being half motivator and half comforter... like my hand on my daughters back as she was learning to ride her bike. Firm yet gentle. Guiding yet unleashing. You sense that at any moment it is OK for you to simple allow yourself to rest in it's guidance BUT it is equally OK to simply move forward passionately allowing each nudge to keep you focused.

The next picture is a little different.

In the next picture the mighty hand has a firm grasp on her and is moving as IT chooses. At first I imagine this hand as powerfully controlling my destiny and making me move towards things that I don't necessarily want... like when I make my son eat his broccoli. It feels powerful and, ironically, a bit removed from my reality. At times it might even feel unloving. But as I reflected on this picture further this week in light of current events in my life another picture began to unfold. Maybe this second picture is more like the time I saved my son off the bottom of the pool. My grasp was NOT gentle. My movements were NOT graceful. My response was forceful (almost uncaring)... and yet, in that moment, my heart could not have been filled with more love.

This week, due to circumstances that were WAY beyond my control, my trip to India was pulled out from under me. A trip I have been looking forward to for a year. As much as I want to blame governments, policies and even the enemy... I know the "Hand of God" is more powerful than all of them. I know the "Hand of God" moves as He (in goodness) wills. I know what His hand feels like on my back as He moves me forward and I know what it feels like to be rescued from circumstance or self. I guess the thing I don't understand is why I'm repeatedly surprised when it happens...

Lord, I surrender to Your hand. I surrender to Your plan. Lead as You will... and will as You lead. Our lives are Yours to do with as You will... any time, any place and at any cost. Amen.

entitlement...

I read an article today on techticker about the 18.4 Billion dollars that were spent on Wall Street bonuses this last year. Bob O'Brian comments that, "The sense of entitlement that's been engendered in this group of people has clearly not been beaten out of them by the brutal performance of the financial sector over the course of the last year,"... truly amazing. Taking what is the 6th highest level of bonuses that have ever been recorded in one of the most financially shattered years America has ever had... and potentially FROM the very money the government had given to them to help get the economic gears moving again. Entitlement indeed.

As I read, I couldn't help but think of the spiritual metaphore this situation represents. How often do I move with this same sense of entitlement with the grace given me? It's mine to do with what I want... but instead of passing it on to those around me I horde it. And, in the midst of a omnipotent eternal "TARP" plan, I protect my assets instead of sharing the wealth. Entitlement indeed.

Forgive us Lord and move us forward...

friends, hope and forgiveness

Psalm 71:14

But as for me, I will always have hope; I will praise you more and more.

Yesterday Pastor Brian preached a great message on hope from the life of David - you can listen to the message at RE:hope's website (it's the most recent one). I love the community I worship with... my church. I love it because of the many friends that I have there. I love it because of the great times of musical worship. I love it for how it is always asking how it can love people better. I love it for its passion for God's Word. I love it for being a real community (imperfect and being perfected) amidst the many facades. I love it for what it stands for... and what it stands against.

What does it stand for and against you ask?

For HOPE and against Hopelessness... it is, after all, regarding Hope!

But, one of the things I love the most about my church is that it challenges me. This week I found a place inside my soul that I needed to "do business" with. Not just in a quiet "make-it-disappear" way but in a public "right-it-in-a-blog" way. With out going into too many details of the sermon, at one point our Pastor was talking about the opposition David faced from the many people in his community... friends, family and authorities. He talked about how they were hope "suckers" in David's life - standing against his life, heart and belief's about who he was and who he believed God was. As I sat and listened I found myself saddened by what I was hearing.

I have in my life gone through seasons where I was the voice of hope in a dark place... and in fact I believe that God has placed a call in my life in that area. I believe in the power of hope. I believe in its power to change people in the present with a picture of what will be... a powerful belief (and especially appropriate on Martin Luther King Day). But I have also gone through seasons where I have lost that voice... lost that picture... lost my hope. I became one of David's hope "suckers" and unfortunately, in the midst of these tough last few years, those seasons have been more prevalent... and I believe my community has suffered for it.

And so, for those whom I may have affected in these past seasons... I ask for your forgiveness. I am so sorry that I did not represent Jesus or my calling well. I confess that I lost my way in alleyways of discouragement and confusion... and that I became preoccupied by own issues, entanglements and anxieties. But I also confess to you that Jesus makes all things new and that though I know I am prone to fall my confidence is not in my "self" but it is in the power of God to change a heart of stone into a heart of flesh. I believe in the power of hope and I want to say with David, "But as for me, I will always have hope; I will praise you more and more."

Do Your work Lord in me. Amen.

Happy Hogmanay

Colossians 3:12-14

Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.

We are wishing all our friends a great New Year and a Happy Hogmanay!

Father, lead us as Your chosen people into this New Year. Give us the strength to live as holy dearly loved children... clothed with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Help us Lord to bear with one another AND forgive each other as we should... as You have forgiven us. And over all this Lord we pray for love that might bind us together as one holy family. Amen.

But God...

Ephesians 2:4-10

But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which he loved us, even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ – by grace you have been saved – and raised us up with him and seated us with him in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, so that in the coming ages he might show the immeasurable riches of his grace in kindness toward us in Christ Jesus. For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast. For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.

But God… We all have them right? Those times in our walk with God where loving our Lord with all of our heart, soul, mind, and strength seems effortless. Fully alive moments of success in relationship or service that makes our passion for God so real…our calling so clear…our ability to sacrifice so natural. Moments where we can almost hear our Father in heaven saying, “this is my son…my daughter…in them I am well pleased!” We actually feel the “immeasurable riches of his grace in kindness toward us in Christ Jesus.” But then, there are other times…times when love grows cold…times when each step stirs fear, indecision and doubt. They are seasons of death and darkness…seasons of the cross.

But God… This past year, our community in Glasgow has been walking through one such season. We have experienced brokenness in ways that we always hope as children of God we won’t have to. In many respects, we have watched as the ministry that God built has been slowly disassembled before our eyes. It is a season of asking many questions about our calling, our purpose and our reason to exist.

But God… It is in these times that it is the hardest to believe that he has not made a mistake… that “we are his workmanship”. It is in these times that it is the hardest to believe that we have a purpose… “good works, which God prepared beforehand”. It is in these times that it is hard to walk the steps laid out for us.

But God… It is a thought, an idea, which I hold in my mind and heart that fuels my passion in the hardest of times. It is as if Paul writes these words for me to show this crux moment between what was and what is. Between what has been and what will be. It is my Lord Jesus walking step by brutal step towards His greatest moment of darkness and His greatest gift of love.

But God… It stirs the heart in the deepest place. Could it be that God is still intimately and strategically moving in and out of our lives shaping and forming all that we are… fixing that which was broken… finding that which was lost… making us into what He has always dreamed we would be? Could it be that the weight of this world does not have to rest on my shoulders…but that it rests on the crucified shoulders of this “great love with which he loved us”?

But God…

Brotherhood

1 Peter 5:5-10

...Clothe yourselves, all of you, with humility toward one another, for "God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.” Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you. Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. Resist him, firm in your faith, knowing that the same kinds of suffering are being experienced by your brotherhood throughout the world. And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who has called you to his eternal glory in Christ, will himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you

I’m not sure how long I was unconscious… 5-10 seconds maybe. All I remember is that I was vomiting over the edge of the fence one moment and dreaming about sleeping in my own bed the next. I think it was then that I remembered that I was in India… that only moments ago I had been standing… conscious.

We had been there to have a fun-day with a handful of orphaned kids (dieing of AIDS) but, within moments of our arrival, I was the one being ministered to by Solomon, the “man with many children”. I was heartbroken, embarrassed and humbled. He just cracked a big white smile and said that this happened to the children all the time… he had lots of experience.

Humility is an interesting thing… hard to produce; it seems to be something you need to “fall” into. Often it is difficult for us to embrace knowingly – to actually set about “clothing” ourselves. When we do, it often feels fake or feigned. I wonder if that is because, often, humility walks so closely with suffering… and suffering is a traveling partner that we are so afraid of in our western world. Yet, when I sat with one of the little ones on my lap… and imagined Solomon fanning them after they had passed out… my heart broke for him… for them. Suffering was not a stranger to these children.

In these pictures are many who I would consider my brother… Wade, my brother in Christ through the last couple of years. Jeff, my ACTUAL brother (in-law) who I have had the joy of serving beside many times. My Dad, both a father and a brother, who has been a great source of encouragement for me as I have pursued God. Solomon, a man whose passion for Christ has produced a compassion for the abandoned children of India… and still had some to spare for a bewildered foreigner/brother in Christ. But perhaps the most humbling and perspective giving brother is the little boy whose sheepish smile said, “yeah, I’ve been there before. You’ll be ok… but you sure look funny on the ground!”

Thank you my little friend.

Lord God, do the impossible today… in this moment… and heal him from the disease that ravishes his body. And may we meet again… in this age or the next. Amen.